update LOL.

sports excel main draw.
lost to nur amanina 63 62.
disappointed.


corneill spaapan is hot.
hottest dude i've ever seen alive. seriously.

blah mood.

i dunno how im gonna get through mid terms.
i dunno how im gonna get through sejarah.
i dunno how im gonna get through chinese.
i dunno how im gonna get through bm.
i dunno.
i'm really really worried.
im surprised i haven't got nightmares yet.
history.
how do you concentrate in ravi's class?
HOW?!
how do you pay attention to chicken little when she's always pickin on us.

oh goddd. please.
i have to do it.
the alternative is just no way.
it's totally out.
the only option is all A's.
i have to.

i think i'll start chanting "i think i can i think i can i think i can" under my breath just like the little train that could.
-.-

i cant take the stress.
i cant study. i open the book i stare at it for minutes and i cant take anything in.
whats happening to my memory? i feel hopeless and scared.
terrified.
the reason? facebook? the computer?
i've tried to study so many times. history.
most i can do is half a chapter.
i think i'm turning stupid.

stop. it.

omg yes i know i've gone too far sometimes.
but not your first day knowing me right?
stop giving me the "face". like the "OMG YOU'RE SO MEAN" face.
yes i can be mean sometimes.
im trying to fuckin change, and it doesn't help when you're giving me the face all the time you know.
i hate it. when they give me the look. like "what's wrong with you?"
or they pile some stuff like "if you dont have anything nice to say, dont say it".
not like i haven't heard all that before.
seriously.
GIVE ME A BREAK.
now that i realize i've crossed the line too many times, i know. and im trying to stop.
i'm sorry. i really am.
but honestly, haven't you done that before?

(p.s. not specifically referring to anyone.)

woah update.

yeah need big fat updates here..
as i mentioned in the previous post, the sports excel tourney.
i didnt need to play after all. -.- cause in the under-16 category there were only four ppl. and 4 ppl go to main draw. so 4 ppl nuff d, so no need to play.
yeah. i was so damn nervous the night before. woke up so damn early and couldn't fall asleep. then mom came into my room and said i dont need to play. then i snoozed all the way till 10. :)
but yeah the main draw is this friday afternoon. dont get to skip school after all dammit. i mean, friday's timetable is suckyy.
im damn freaking freaking nervous.i mean, MAIN DRAWWW. i know it's not even the finals but it's playing against people from diff states. all over malaysia.
damn damn nervous. need someone to teman me. anyone? ;D
got a few other tourneys coming up too, plus monthly medals every month. next tourney's in mid-may.
yeaah. im feeling really really frustrated with myself now. my serve has deserted me. it's like my arms are made of jelly and can't serve. sometimes can sometimes can't. i think it's cause i never really gave my arms the chance to rest so yeah.
my legs hurt, my arms, my back. agh.
did i mention. i was at the LTAM website yesterday, and i was reading the list of the ranked people in malaysia. yeah i stalked them. :DDDD looking forward to seeing them in person at the main draw this weekened HAAAAAHHH. <3
***

nothing much been's going on, seriously. went to mcD's that day. those retarded people kept saying "ESTHER TANN. ESTHER TANNN. ESTHERR TANNN." when i was on the phone. and when i put it down. im like. what???
walao. martin tan or something. right. his name. LOL.
***

im really really addicted to mizz nina + colby o. what you waiting forrr. <3
***

oh yeah. how could i forget. py, aud, sab came over to my place for sivik project. made tong yuen. blahhh kim and mad tak boleh datang. D:
anyways. you people love my bro so much? i'd just like to say in this post that he's the most irritating shit you'll ever know. ugh.

undecided.

this is kinda weird. blogging in both blogs. doesn't give you much heart to blog in the other one if you already did on this.
nvm.
tomorrow's the sports excel tourney, i'm so so so so sorry sabrina to give you the time last minute, but i don't know myself cause my mom went this afternoon to check the time and it wasn't posted up yet. :( I really really hope you can come though.

i really hate the feeling when you can't cheer up someone's who's upset.

hmm. cupcake competition. blardy hell 20 MINUTES??? the judges are seriously crazy. i mean do you think those super pro cupcake designers can do a fantastic cupcake in TWENTY MINUTES??? maybe they can lah, but heck are we pros?
obviously no. -.-
both mine and mad's were flops. the blardy dewan was stinkin hot, whats wrong with doing it in the KH ROOM???
my choc was melting and mad's fondant was melting.
aud and py won. theirs was freakin fantastic seriously.
well even though mad and i didn't win, we still had a lot of fun.

immablogintwoblogs

i feel light and free lol.
kembara orientation camp didn't really live up to my rockin high expectations but it was still cool.
funny.
ermm.
eye twitchies.
sleepy sleepy.
joined sports excel tourney. wonder if wen yang joined.
erm ermm.
there's mssd under 15 tennis woohoo.

yea. i'm bracing myself for a week of torture.
MUSCLES, BEWAREEE.